Where’s the Doritos?
“I feel so bad for the squirrels,” my sister said. “The trees were not very fruitful this year so they don’t have enough to eat.”
“Oh, that explains why they’ve been gathering at my patio,” I said, and told her how today, for instance, a squirrel came by and fought to open my can of Pam near the barbecue grill. He rolled with it until it fell onto the grass and he jumped after it. Ten minutes later, I found its red lid on top of the swing set.
I also told her how a few days ago my children forgot a bag of Doritos outside overnight. In the morning, a squirrel appeared, sniffing around until he reached the Doritos bag. He ate from it, and then his friends came and ate from it. The next several days, different colored squirrels stopped by looking for food. In the past, I have given them bread, cookies, cereal. But at one point, they started to get too close for comfort, coming right up to my slide door.
“If the trees are not fruitful,” I said to my sister, “how come this year I have seen more squirrels than ever before in this area?”
She pondered on that, but had no answer. I think in America, everyone is fed well, even the squirrels.